they want you as a new recruit.
Reeling from the rejection of an emotionally unavailable friend with benefits I decided it was time for me to try and meet new people. Specifically boys, and more specifically boys who are interested in being more than friends and taking me places other than just their bedroom.
A friend e-mailed me Friday afternoon asking if I wanted to go out with her that night to a bar in the city. I thought about it for a second, realized this would be a good opportunity to try and talk to strange boys and would probably be more exciting than sitting home,watching Doctor Who as I planned to, so I said sure.
Getting dressed up to go out to me means looking like I could pick up sailors in the 50’s or early 60’s. I flip my hair out and put on black eyeliner and red lipstick where it is borderline Halloween makeup. I’ve never gone out looking for boys before, it’s very unlike me, but found it very fitting that the first time I did there was a group of sailors at the bar we went to. I don’t have any particular interest in sailors or any other men in uniform for that matter. I did however, have an interest in making out with one of them while wearing their hat. Mainly because I look good in hats, my dad always told me that, so it has to be true.
I set my sights on the sailor that had glasses and looked the youngest. I had no real plans of going over and talking to him, I was perfectly satisfied with knowing I was better looking than the girls he was currently talking, and would of course, look better in his hat.
I made the mistake of saying, “I totally want to make-out with that sailor” to more than a few people. But I was still surprised when he came over and introduced himself to me. I can’t remember his name. It was something with an S. Steven, Sean, Sven, who knows. He offered to get me some water, not a drink, water. Now I don’t drink at all, but Sven didn’t know that, and even though I didn’t want a drink, it still bothered me all I was offered was water. Turns out he was 23 and from Nebraska.Him not being underage and far from barely legal made me lose interest quick.
Trying to keep a conversation going with someone who only comes ashore once every four or five months isn’t easy. Especially when the desire to make-out with him in a dark corner of the bar disappeared within the first minute of talking to him. Sven excused himself to go to the bathroom and I quickly found my way into a booth hoping he wouldn’t come over and talk to me again. As soon as I saw him talking to someone else and I was all points bulletin to the rest of my night being sailor free I turned to my friend and said, “Why is my friend with benefits being such a douchebag.”
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I too, share your dream to make out with a sailor while wearing their hat. I think another night of bar hopping during “shore week” is in our future.
LOVE this story. I once had a friend with benefits, but it was fun for all of 5 mins because I’m way too emotionally needy for that kind of shit. (Plus, he was a jerk.) Case in point, I MARRIED my freakin’ one-night stand. So much for my experimental wild-child days.